Today I called in sick. “I’m sick.” I coughed as Terry answered the phone. I wasn’t. I just decided to give it a go.

I stayed in bed until 8:32AM, twelve minutes longer than usual. No sense wasting the day, I thought. I slithered out of bed with an impish pride, and sauntered downstairs. Merv and Georgia were finishing off their porridge. I could smell the adhesive binding them to their routine. “Are you late?” asked Merv. “No.” I responded, bluntly.